Road to marriage in Japan②

Hello. The other day I introduced Japanese typical wedding style and my one.

My wedding flow is as shown below.

1 Propose

(1 and a half years before the wedding ceremony)

2 Start to choose a wedding hall

(1 and a half years before the wedding ceremony)

3 Meet each parent

(1 year and 3 months before the wedding ceremony)

4 Decide on a wedding hall

(1 year and 2 months before the wedding ceremony)

5 Choose wedding dresses

(1 year and 2 months before the wedding ceremony. Then I decided 10 months before the wedding ceremony. )

6 Looking for an engagement ring

(1 year and a month before the wedding ceremony)

7 Yuino (a traditional Japanese ceremony) & meeting dinner party

(1 year before the wedding ceremony)

8 Search for a new house

(8 months before the wedding ceremony. )

9 Entry in family register

(6 months before the wedding ceremony. )

10 Start to have a wedding ceremony meeting

(4 months before the wedding ceremony. )

11 Wedding photos in advance

(3 months before the wedding ceremony. )

12 Looking for wedding rings

(1 month before the wedding ceremony. )

13 The wedding day
14 Honeymoon

(3 months after the wedding ceremony. )

※ That is just in my case. Not in all Japanese cases.

I  wrote 1 Propose 2 Start to choose a wedding hall 3 Meet each parent last time. This time I will talk about my important choice for my wedding, ④Decide on a wedding hall and ⑤choose wedding dresses(The table’s boldface). Choosing my dress was very fun!

4 Decide on a wedding hall

Couples go around several wedding halls which are matched with their ideal. They can look at the ceremony hall ( a chapel or a Shinto shrine )and the reception hall actually. Sometimes the hall is decorated like a wedding day. The wedding staffs explain their hall’s good points and a schedule until a wedding ceremony. The couple can ask them questions.

There are many deciding factors for choosing a hall. For example,

・price

・facilities

・performance

・dishes

・staffs

・location

・clothing

(I referred “minna-no-wedding” which is a Japanese wedding review site)

in Japanese only ↑

I had been looking for the ideal wedding hall. I visited about 5 places for 3 months.

I decided one hotel because

・facilities are new and beautiful

・dishes are delicious

・we can do performance we want to do

・It is easily accessible

I booked the hotel over a year before the wedding day.

↑some wedding halls which I visited

5 Choose wedding dresses

After deciding the wedding hall, first, a bride starts to choose a wedding dress or a kimono. Most wedding halls cooperate with dress shops. In Japan, brides often wear two dresses. For example, some brides wear a white and colored dress. Some brides wear a wedding dress and a kimono. They change clothing at their wedding reception. That is called “oironaoshi(お色直し)”. As many brides borrow wedding dresses or kimonos from dress shops, (Of course, some brides make or buy their dresses,) popular and beautiful dresses are reserved quickly. They find their favorite dresses,  then they have to reserve them not to be gotten by other brides. Average of rental fee is 250,000~300,000 yen per dress. Some brides continue to look for dresses after the reservation because new dresses arrive one after another.

In my case, I wanted to wear a wedding dress and a colored dress. I decided the white dress soon, but couldn’t decide on the colored dress. I went to dress shops many times with my husband and mother (They are my advisers!)… about 10 times for 3 months! I tried on more than 30 dresses to find a favorite one. Of Course, not all brides spend the time to choose dresses, but I couldn’t find my dress quickly. It was very hard but fun! Finally, I chose the wedding dress, the colored dress, another wedding dress (for after party) and accessories 10 months before my wedding day. In contrast, my husband chose his tuxedo in a day! He is speedy!

↑some wedding dresses I tried on

Wow! Sorry, I didn’t mean to go on so long. The road to marriage is still long… I will also write the rest little by little.

Click here to read the next episode.

3rd episode ⇒ Road to marriage③

4th episode ⇒ Road to marriage④

Final episode ⇒ Road to marriage⑤

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rice (Japanese OL)

Japanese OL. (OL means “office lady”. Women who work in offices.) I was born in a rural part of  Kanagawa prefecture (near Tokyo ) in the latter half of the 1980s. I was raised in Kanagawa and live and work in Tokyo now. I live with my husband. I study English by writing this blog!

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